IRC - Internet Relay Chat ... Short version.

Download MIRC at www.MIRC.com, install it. Then go to File...Options [image 1 below]...Connect(or IRC servers), click add server, type in "irc.bondage.com" port 6665, pick a nick name and alt nick name, then click "join IRC server". Hopefully you should connect. Once you connect you can type "/list" to see a list of open channels, find #TNGC or type "/join #TNGC" to join the #TNGC channel. Once in the channel [image 2 below] you should see atleast @TIEMU in the channel, IM on almost 24/7 (I'm a slave to the net!, I got DSL baby). So then type message into the line at the bottom, and hit enter and you should see is displayed in the channel for people to see.

If you need any tech help you can email me for help if you can not get on. Im almost always logged in, but if I have a _zzz or _out next to my nick, im away.

IRC - Internet Relay Chat ... Long version

IRC is the chat of the Internet. A person who wants to get to IRC may do so from any number of internet service providers (ISP),such as Netcom,Earthlink, Mindspring.even AOL. IRC is not like AOL IM, in that you can get there from more than one source. If one wishes to subscribe to an internet service provider, look in the local phone book, ask friends for suggestions, or see the appendix of this packet for some of the more popular services.

The hierarchy for Internet Chat is as follows:
Internet Service Provider (AOL, Mindspring Earthlink etc)
Chat client (mIRC, pIRCh, java, MSChat)
Network server (Dalnet, efnet, undernet, D/s net)
Channel

It is necessary to have a chat software program. also called a 'client'. The most popular of these is mIRC and the software can be downloaded at www.mIRC.com. Always look for the latest (highest number) version and select the software appropriate for your computer, ie 16 bit or 32 bit.

Once this software has been downloaded and installed, log on to the Internet Service Provider via the modem or cable connection. Once connected, launch the chat client and select a server (network server) to connect to IRC.
There are several 'nets' within the structure of IRC. There are efnet, dalnet, undernet and the D/s nets to name a few. These are reached by using specific 'servers'. A large problem with IRC is that there are many different servers, thus forcing one to deal with the issue of lagging. The best way to avoid lag is to be on the same server as those with which you wish to chat.

The number of rooms [called "channels"] on IRC vary. There are no fixed channels on IRC, but some are open all the time, due to automated "bots" [greeters] that are a permanent fixtures of that particular channel. Anyone may create a channel, and any name may be used. To create a channel, simply type /join # [channel name]. Each channel has certain participants whose nicknames appear in the sidebar with a @ in front of them. This means that person is a channel operator (op). They have certain monitoring capabilities to oversee what happens in that channel, such as if a flamer comes in and is disruptive, the channel ops have the power to kick them out, or even permanently ban them from that room. There is a D/s community on IRC, much the same as on Prodigy or AOL. Since there are so many channels within IRC, it is much easier to simply know the areas that are D/s related, so you don't have to scroll through the channel listing to find them. The following is a list of D/s rooms that are quite popular.
#bdsm-Prodigy_exiles (this is where many former Prodigy members gather)
#slavery
#bdsm
#bdsmlounge
#bondage
#femdom
#submission
#spanking

You may do a search on all channels relating to a specific topic. Be forewarned though, that this process can take several minutes. To join a channel, type /join # channel name. You can be in more than one channel at a time. While in a channel, just type/ join # room name, and a new window will open up and you will be in the channel as well as the one you started out in.
To leave a channel, one must deliberately close it by using the close window function in the upper right hand corner of your window. Instant messages on IRC are similar to IMS on AOL. In IRC there exists the capability to be in IM's and continue to watch room activity.
Not all participants on IRC are friendly. If you are a relative newbie to the world of chat. it is recommended that you join #bdsm-Prodigy_exiles. We are a bit more patient there and are willing to provide whatever help you need to learn the methods of IRC chat.

Let's acquaint you with different types of "rooms" and the etiquette of them. Most of the rooms are open, meaning anyone can enter them. Therefore, it's hard to enforce any kind of behavior "rules" but these are courtesies that we ask and hopefully are respected.

Common courtesy and respect for those "talking" is asked.
Feel free to add your opinion; don't be shy. Remember, all of us have opinions, there is no ONE RIGHT WAY to live this lifestyle. When you watch and participate in a discussion you are hearing a lot of opinions; you have to use the information and mold it to suit your individuality and your relationship. It's what works for you and your partner

Forum rooms can be set up with formal rules as the host/hostess sees fit. Be sure to ask and follow them. The Forums can alternate according to the host/hostess schedules. Topics are their choosing as in any forum. Got something you want to discuss or learn more about? Try to host a meeting or find someone to host one for you with your topic in mind. Many of our discussions can become rather personal and graphic due to our lifestyle. We try to remain open to invite all in, but we also want to avoid those who only come in to harass or flame.

A newbie is someone new that doesn't know much about D/s. A wannabe is someone who may pretend to want to know or pretend to know to use that information to play games. A gonnabe is a sincere newbie who is learning and wants to participate in this lifestyle as they are able. A regular is just someone who has been online for a while, rather well known, but that does not mean they are an expert on D/s. No one is. We are all learning. Some know a lot more than others and some have a lot more experience. Those people you can go to for help. The people who host forums, hold discussion, or helped with this package are good starting points.
Imagine yourself in a room with a lot of strangers. Just be respectful and friendly. The main thing is common courtesy. Calling a Dom by "Master" is something usually only done by his sub {s} and calling a Domme "Mistress" the same. If you call them this, you will probably be called down by them and their submissives, in a nice way of course {g}. It sounds like a lot at first. We are not immune to bad days . Unfortunately at some point you may witness some of this. Please excuse us, we are only human after all {g}. Even if you decide that D/s is not for you, we can convey at least that we are not freaks or sex crazed people who like to be beaten and whipped, although we do rather enjoy it at times {wink}.

Nicknames - Your nickname is a one word description of you. You can use it to describe your personality, ie. "sassy sub". Or it can be used to describe what you want, ie, "DomLooking". Your nickname can also show ownership, such as "M'sSub", but not all subs use their Masters name in their nickname. It is all a matter of personal taste, or what your Dom/me wants. Remember, your nickname is YOU, here in cyberspace, so choose it carefully.

In the D/s rooms, it is common practice for Dom/mes to use "Sir", "Lord", "Master", "Mistress", or "Dom/me" in their name. This is an easy way for all to know that their preference is the "top", or dominant position. Some submissives use the actual word "sub" in their name, but this is not as common. If you are unsure of a persons preference, you may get the information you are looking for by simply.... ASKING!

What to put in your Info

... BE CAREFUL. Do not put anything in your info boxes that you would not tell someone in PM {private message}. This information is readily available to anyone that PM's you and everyone in any room that you enter.

1. If its rude, crude or socially unacceptable, use the IGNORE function. Doing that INSTEAD of responding will make the LobbyLizard unable to get to you. if you respond, he now has an option to continually harrass. If you exclude , they never can get you angered. Facing facts, these dudes don't usually have that big an attention span to remember you unless you prompt them to do so.

2. If it is a polite "hi" or something, answer back in a similar vein. you can personally never make too many friends. It does no harm to be nice to folks who IM'd just because they like the name, the room name or the profile. Many of these folks like old movies or astrology and you can have GREAT conversations with them.

3. If the IM starts out fairly simple and THEN the person becomes annoying, ask them to stop. If it continues use the ignore function.

4. Some IMs are just too good to pass up, though. A sarcastic sense of humor does ocassionally enjoy "yanking chains" and "instigating trouble".
The variety of people online make for interesting conversations you would not get in most places. Sure, some are rude and obnoxious, but so are many of the people you work with and you handle that okay. Being tolerant of differences, learning things and making friends are reasons you can enjoy being online.

ABBREVIATIONS

SLANG

These are symbols and shorthands meant to convey the emotional nuances, facial expressions, and physical movements that are missing from conversation online. Words set inside <> convey actions. Smileys are symbolic pictures, generally viewed sideways.

Keeping yourself safe is a basic step to making BDSM fun. The person who is ultimately responsible for safety is YOU -- we all would like to believe that the person we are considering as a partner wouldn't consider hurting us in any way. Many would like to think that being behind the anonymity of a monitor ensures safety. There are an equal amount of people that still subscribe to the " It Can't Happen To Me " syndrome. It can happen, and it's up to each person to decide on how anonymous, and how safe, they really are.
Don't be pressured into giving your phone number out during a discussion. Your phone number reveals many things--- your name and your address are the 2 most obvious.

Don't allow yourself to be lulled by being asked to call the other person-- since the inception of caller ID and the "call-back" features, you have basically still given out your phone number. At some point in a relationship, you may well want to give your partner your phone number. This is an exchange of information, not a means of pressure.

Use common sense and courtesy in cyber-- This is a one dimensional medium, and the words you type are seen flatly on the screen. These words can hurt emotionally and be easily misunderstood. Try to make yourself as clear as possible to avoid hurting the person you are talking with and use the ever famous glyphs for smiles if you are saying something that you meant to be teasing

Avoid words and phrases that are degrading or belittling. If it would hurt to hear it, it definitely will hurt to see it flatly printed on the screen. Some things are said in BDSM play that are meant in a different perspective--a Dominant calling his sub a "slut" is by no means degrading if this is exciting to them both, for instance.

If you find a conversation disturbing to you, or leading in a direction that causes you pain, say so! Tell the other person that you are distressed; perhaps something didn't come out on the screen the way they meant it, or perhaps they meant it exactly the way you read it. If that was the case, you have the option of telling them you choose not to participate in the conversation, and using your exclude icon.

Above all, we realize the excitement and emotion that's involved in your discovery of BDSM can lead to unthinking acts. Correlate your actions on-line with what you know is a safe action in your real life! Would you give your name, address, and many many details of your personal life to a stranger on the street? Would you do that on-line? Would you allow someone to manipulate you to the point you are harmed in real life? Think about it... your mental health and safety is at stake.

Meeting People:
You may choose at some point to meet the people you talk to on-line. There are some very basic rules that need to be followed to aid in your safety.
Talk to the people you intend to meet-- on-line, on the phone. Get a feeling for the type of person they are by conversations, inflections, things you have in common. Talk to people that you know in common. Don' t feel like you are intruding in their personal life by asking questions. Truthfully, someone may have had a bad experience, and give a bad reference. However, go with your gut feeling from your own conversations and the reputation that prevails.

Meet in a public place, where you are seen and recognized by others, if at all possible. You wouldn't go to a hotel room with a perfect stranger any other time, would you? Make sure someone that you trust knows where you are, and who you are meeting. If you are meeting a Dominant or a submissive for the first time, make arrangements for a safe call to a person you trust. A safe call is a phone call to a friend, a relative, whomever you choose, to let them know you are OK. Prearrange a phrase to use to let them know everything is all right. Make the call on time and make sure they know what to do if you don't call.

A first meeting may very well simply consist of having coffee and a discussion face to face with the person that has aroused your interest. This is practical for those that have discovered someone that lives within a reasonable distance. However, many that meet on-line find that their potential partner is some distance away, and make plans to explore during their meeting. Give yourself some time to talk publicly if this is the case and get a feel for who your partner is, now that you have actually met. If you have any doubts, beyond a natural nervousness, LISTEN TO YOUR INSTINCTS!
Bondage is exciting, but not a good idea the first time you meet with someone. Once you are tied up is not the best time to wonder if your partner can be trusted! If the relationship develops, this and other avenues of BDSM can be explored.

Always carry condoms--- the basic piece of equipment to defend against STD's. If your partner refuses to use a condom, he is NOT thinking of your safety, or his! Don't depend on your partner to have a condom with him.

These are very basic standards for safety. What you have read is not meant to frighten you away from the excitement of your desires, but to remind you that YOU are important enough to stay safe! A caring partner will encourage you to play safe and will have that in mind when playing, on-line or off line. The goal is to learn, to grow, to satisfy each other, to enjoy the time you spend exploring BDSM. The best way to do that for a long time to come is to do it safely.
Please be careful of what you say in instant messages. Remember, it does not take much information for a person to find out where you live.

Any combination of the aforementioned items can give someone the ability to find you. Even less, if the person has friends on the police force, in the DMV or friends who are computer hackers. Remember, there is much information on all of us on various data bases, and an inventive hacker can gain access to that information with very little to go on. Please be careful - don't trust too easily, there is always time to get more personal when you know the other person better. If a person insists you give them personal information, it may be a sign that he or she has more in mind than an anonymous computer conversation. It is easier than you think, to get to you!

On Phone -
Giving someone your phone number is a huge risk. Even calling someone else can give away information that can lead to locating you. Having an unlisted phone number does not protect you. Once your number is on a persons phone bill, the phone company is able to give that person your name and address. Caller ID can give a person your full name as well as your phone number, and with those two items, it is very easy to find you.

Be protective of personal information. Any one (and one is all that is needed) of these items can be enough to you at risk. Giving out personal information is to open yourself up to someone who may be a stalker, a rapist, or murderer. A cyber relationship is not worth your life, so BE CAREFUL!!!

Last updated: 6/7/02 If you think anything should be added to this page, please contact me.